The Dock Sucks

Even at it's smallest, the stupid thing is taking up 5% of my laptop's vertical real estate. Thanks Apple for taking something that was really nice in Windows 2000, making it shiny, animated (magnification---oooooh!!) and bigger. Do I really want to look at all the horrid icons applications have? Maybe.

BUT MAYBE NOT!

People crap on Windows a lot. A lot of it's deserved, but at least with XP (I can't speak for Vista) I could make it look like Win2000, change all the colors around and customize it reasonably extensively. Recolor the OS down to the application level, change all the fonts. Its' really nice. My copy of Ubuntu isn't even as easy to muck around with, so I applaud Windows (XP)

Things I can customize in Apple's OS-X:

1. The color of the minimize/maximize/close gumdrops on each window
2.

That's right. There is no number two.

For all their "it just works" and "It's for people not robots" attitude, the choices in OS-X are nil. You get gray and white and more white and more white and a little more gray and some colored gumdrops. And you know what? You're gonna fucking like it!

I'm well aware that the reason Apple's popular is the same reason the Nazis were fashionable: fetishistic attention to detail and complete and utter uniformity. But I'm a "mac"; I'm your guy from the movie Dodgeball, with my comfortable clothes and desire to get high and make beats in garage band. I am an individual, and your operating system is not letting me shine.

Truth be told, I could give two shits about changing the font. Whatever they've got going on works well enough (except in Maya--are you reading this Autodesk?). I want two things:

1. As a working professional in the digital arts, I'd like to be able to make my OS a dark-ish gray so I'm not blinded by the mandatory bar across the top of my screen when I'm working on dark imagery. I don't need to "theme" color my os, but the ability to darken it down (and not that garish "cmd+opt+ctrl+8" nega screen).

2. The ability to not have the dock, but instead a drop down menu on the mandatory top bar where I could put my aliases instead. (Where have I seen this before.....?) Then, when I didn't need them (which is most of the time--and that is true for everyone) all my dock application icons aren't annoyingly in my way or popping up to say "hey" every time my cursor goes to the bottom of the screen.

Admit you screwed up. Admit the dock, like your shiny screens may impress the type of people who are more into shinyness than functionality, admit the dock is a bad design choice.

All I'm asking for is the option. I'd even be happy if it was command line only, I don't care how hard you have to bury it, but I want it.

Seriously, Whoever does Claire Bennet's Makeup Sucks

Holy good Jon Benet, why?

Painting the face of a tramp on a little kid only makes you a closet pedophile, so knock it off. Ever since that makeup commercial I know she doesn't have to look like a pederast's concubine. Please, for my ability to keep watching this new "rebooted" Heroes, stop it with the whore's makeup on Claire.

Adrienne Brody Sucks

Sure he made some movie where he played piano in the Holocaust (can that just be a separate Academy Award subset by the way? Best Performance/Movie/Director in a Holocaust movie?) but ever since Adrienne won or didn't win (I forget) he's done nothing cinematically noteworthy.

His entire career is spent looking smugly at the camera in Tag Heuer and Dior Homme ads. He's basically Paris Hilton for all he contributes to his "craft" these days.

No, he's worse. She's never won an Oscar.

The G.I. Joe Movie Already Sucks

Superbowl commercial iced with these two gems of dialogue,

"Technically, we don't exist"

and

Government Stooge: "What did you say your outfit was called?"
General Hawk: "I didn't"


Oooooh..... That simmer you hear is me in a stew of BAD-MOHTERF*CKING-ASS!!!!!

OH YEAH BABY!

Congratulations, by the way, to the Jimmy and Eric Olsen for winning Brietbart Junior High's "write your own G.I. Joe movie" contest.